though fallen low, He raises us up

All around

Hope is springing up from this old ground

out of chaos life is being found

in You.

You make beautiful things

You make beautiful things out of the dust.

You make beautiful things

You make beautiful things out of us.

from Redeeming Love:

"I'm going to need to your help," Angel said to Johnathan.

"First I have to tell you what happened today."

She told them about meeting Torie and lunching with her. She told them of the young prostitute's dejection and hopelessness and how she had felt the same way for so many years.

"She could have had a job with Virgil if she had known how to cook. As it is, he was kind enough to let her stay if I'd go down and work with her for the next few weeks until she knows what to do. She's quick, she'll be able to handle things on her own in no time."

"You're losing us," Jonathan said. The girl was so excited that she was making little sense.

"Torie said if she could find a way out, she'd take it. Virgil asked if she could cook and she said no. And it came to me, right there in Virgil's! Why not?"

"Why not what?!" Susanna said, exasperated. "You're making no sense."

"Why not give her a way out," Angel said. "Teach her to cook. Teach her to sew. Teach her to make hats. Teach her anything that would give her another way to make a living. Jonathan, I want to buy a house where someone like Torie can come and be safe and learn to earn her own living without selling her body to do it."

Jonathan grew thoughtful. "I have some friends who might help. How much do you think you'll need to get started?"

... Another look at Angel and he knew he couldn't say no and blot out the look of hope and purpose in her eyes. "We'll see to it tomorrow morning."

Oh, God. The sudden insight hurt. I'm going to lose her after all. Not to a wild young zealot, but to Angel and others like her.

He wanted his daughter married and settled with children of her own. He wanted her in a house close by so she could come visit frequently.

He watched Susanna pace back and forth, plans gushing forth like a fountain. Angel was laughing and tossing in her own ideas, one on top of the other. They were both so beautiful, it was hard to look at them. Light shining in the darkness.

Jonathan closed his eyes. Oh, God. It's not the way I had things planned.

But then, what of real, lasting value ever is?

First of all, if you have not read this book, YOU MUST! This is my 3rd or 4th time to read it, and it is even better (and harder) to read this time. To give you a very, very brief overview of the story, Angel is a prostitute who was sold at the age of 8 and lived a life of constant fear, abuse, and degradation. I will not tell you how, but she was rescued, out of her physical surroundings and out of the darkness and horrors of her own soul. It is a beautiful, tragic, hopeful story. Seriously, read it.

This part I wrote is towards the very end of the book. I cried when I read it, like I was hearing the revelation, excitement, and purpose from the heart of one of my very own friends. Angel decides to use the pain of her past to help change the futures of others. How amazing. It reminded me of how I know both the desperation of searching for what I should be doing, what specific plan He has dreamed for me, while at the same time experiencing the joy of knowing parts and pieces of the plan and taking steps to follow His leading. All the while, the entirety of the plan eludes me, which makes life even more frustrating and exciting!

I keep feeling Him break my heart. It's all too wonderful for words... and simultaneously one of the scariest, most difficult things to experience. But is this not what we were made for? This stirring in my heart is uncomfortable. I long to go and do the things He has laid upon this broken, bleeding heart, but they are things that will cost everything. Sometimes I think I am such a crazy person for caring so much, crying so much, being this in love with a God I cannot see and am unable to fathom. Ok, I really think I am a crazy person, but in some strange way it's starting to make sense to me. This faith explains so much, while still leaving so much to question. But I feel the weight of it's truth and I see the evidence of evil and I experience the hope of resurrection. It's all too real now to turn back. Oh God, help me.

Help me to be as courageous and bold as Angel, to let You use whatever You find in me-- whatever You have formed in me for such a time as this. I am willing.

"Love the Lord your God and love one another. Love one another as He loves. Love with strength and purpose and passion, and no matter what comes against you. Don't weaken. Stand against the darkness, and love. That's the way back into Eden. That's the way back to life."