We are Hosea's Wife

I'm reading this morning in the book of Hosea, and I am so broken. Who is this God that so many claim to know and follow and love? Sometimes I read these words and wonder... why have we strayed so far from the truth? Why do we overlook the cries of his heart? And why, why is it so hard for us to come back to him?
This is from chapter 11-
When Israel was a child I loved him as a son and brought him out of Egypt. But the more I called to him, the more he rebelled, sacrificing to Baal and burning incense to idols. I trained him from infancy, I taught him to walk, I held him in my arms. But he doesn't know or even care that it was I who raised him.
As a man would lead his favorite ox, so I led Israel with my ropes of love. I loosened his muzzle so he could eat. I myself have stooped down and fed him. But my people shall return to Egypt and Assyria because they won't return to me... Oh how can I give you up, my Ephraim? How can I let you go? How can I forsake you? My heart cries out within me; how I long to help you! No, I will not punish you as much as my fierce anger tells me to. This is the last time I will destroy Ephraim. For I am God and not man; I am the Holy One living among you, and I did not come to destroy.
For the people shall walk after the Lord. I shall roar as a lion (against their enemies) and my people shall return trembling from the west... And I will bring them home again; it is a promise from the Lord."

He did not come to destroy, but to heal and care for. We are the wayward children who bring it upon ourselves. I wish that I could see my sin as God sees it; that I would be so angry that I would want to kill and destroy that which leads me into its trap. If only we had the heart to feel His pain. If only we had the eyes to see the seductiveness of our own destruction.

If only we had the time to learn his love...

...as I recite verses for my King

I've been in a poetic mood lately. That doesn't happen very often.

Just wanted to share some lines that I really like...

“He has never left you. It is just that your soul is so vast that just like the earth in its innocence it may think, ‘I do not feel my lover’s warmth against my face right now.' But look, my dear, is not the sun reaching down its arms and always holding a continent in its light? God cannot leave us. Its just that our soul is so vast, we do not always feel His lips upon the veil.”

Be kind to yourself, dear-- to our innocent follies. Forget any sounds or touch you knew that did not help you dance.

Great lions can find peace in a cage. But we should only do that as a last resort. So those bars I see that restrain your wings, I guess you wouldn’t mind if I pry them open...

Girls, think twice before inviting God near. His charms will turn you into a slave-- are you ready for such a wonderful bondage?

Come to the edge.
We might fall.

Come to the edge.

It's too high!

Come to the edge!

And they came,

and he pushed,

and they flew.

Disconnected?

So life is still as good as ever, but some things have been brought to my attention and I am steadily more disturbed as the days pass. I am really going to start seeking God as to what to do with all this. I feel as though sometimes He allows us to hear more and see more so we will respond by praying more and loving Him more.
A second grader (7 or 8 years old) brought soft porn to school and was showing other little boys. A fifth grader(10 or 11 years old) asked if oral sex was against the bible. 18 year old guys are celebrating this year of their life by traveling to strip clubs almost every weekend. Other elementary, middle, and high schoolers are into this whole "sexting" thing.
If this doesn't bother you, then I'm not sure what to say. My heart just cannot justify any of this as being remotely close to "ok" or "its just the world we live in".
It only proves how much our enemy really has a hold here.
I've been reading through Rob Bell's book Sex God, and its amazing how much all of it really is connected to the idea that we as humans are so disconnected from God. We choose certain actions and behaviors to attempt to bring reconciliation and healing, but we cause so much more damage than we realize. He says that how we treat the creation reflects how we feel about the Creator. When we shut down our emotions and use someone like an object, we not only diminish their worth-- we are stripping away our own. It breaks my heart. It makes me so sick. And I know its only the beginning. God, how do I stand so firm when this world I live in is so ignorant and selfish? Only by the Spirit can we accomplish this great and honorable feat.

What I also love about that book is how he describes a few of his friends who are celibate, but are also the most sexual people he knows. He dotes on their ability to share their hearts and their lives with so many. They live to serve and give of themselves in a way that is almost unheard of now in this world. This "universal love" is so beautiful...

"I've realized over time that she is a deeply connected person. There is a certain potency to her presence that is hard to describe. She owns no property and she lives as simply as she possibly can because she committed early in her life to give everything she had to making the world the kind of place God dreams it could be. It is a joy to be with her because everything matters in her life. Nothing is shallow or trite or superficial. She's very funny and smart and compassionate- a magnificent human. Because she's been exploring her own soul for so long, she knows herself inside and out. She's at peace, and it's contagious."

I desire that contagious peace, and a contagious Love. I'm so very thankful that God came down and showed us how to really live here. Every time I feel overwelmed, I can see Him and learn from Him, and He draws me into His heart that beats wildly for these who seek other lovers. Jesus... show me again how to love like you love me. I want to bring heaven to earth. I want to witness miracles that only happen from that overflow of your love for all of creation- especially for those who bear your image.
I write this more for myself than anyone. I must be reminded that He is constantly moving, and amidst the chaos and sin, He is loving. He is forever loving us.
Amen.