Lament

A lament is defined as a passionate expression of grief. We were given an assignment this week to find an issue that weighs heavy on our hearts (there are so, so many) and write our own lament. I've been going through a book made at the Kona, Hawaii base called A Voice for the Voiceless. It is about gender injustice around the world-- bringing light to the issues and how we can be praying for them to end.

** Note: Something that keeps going over & over in my head is that as we pray, we should also be willing to be the answer to our own prayers. **

So, one of the first issues in the book is AIDS. I've become more passionate about this injustice. If you don't see it as an injustice, let me explain why it most definitely is, at least in other countries. We all probably know by now that AIDS is mainly spread through sexual contact. In Africa, because of their cultural beliefs and the shame (and often ignorance) that comes with this disease, it continues to spread rapidly. There are approximately 12 million orphans in Africa as a result of AIDS. The older generation is quickly dying off while the younger one is still in the dark as to what has been killing off their families and how it can be stopped.

Now, I'm no African, but as I learn more about this I've discovered some reasons that make this such an injustice, particularly for women. In most of Africa, at least rural Africa, there is a cultural practice in which a man with the AIDS virus has sex with a virgin (who is most likely under the age of 18) to "cure" him of the disease. The girl has no say in this. No protection is provided. She gets AIDS.

Even between married couples, sex is something that does not have to be mutual. It is often forced. It is rarely talked about. And for the wives... rarely enjoyed. Faithfulness in marriage is pretty slim. Often this is another access for AIDS to enter a family. When the mother gets it, the children get it. And the disease keeps spreading.

Here's a story to help you understand:

"In a small village in Mozambique, Zorah wakes up early to begin her work; caring for her three children, her aging father-in-law, and harvesting the fields. Since her husband's death a month ago, responsibility has fallen entirely on her. She is tired, but she says nothing, only gathers up a basket of dirty clothes before heading down the riverbank to wash. A doctor who visits the village every week told Zorah that her husband died of AIDS. She didn't know her husband was infected with a virus called HIV when she married him. She didn't know that he knew he was sick. At the time, she was 16 and he was 31. She didn't know he believed that sleeping with a virgin would cure his disease.

She didn't know that using a condom might have protected her from infection, and if she had known, what difference would it have made? She and her husband never talked about sex; he simply demanded it from her. Sometimes he was rough with her and she would bleed. She didn't know that this increased her vulnerability of contracting the disease.

The sun is coming up over the horizon, glinting on the slow moving ripples that mark the river's constant current. Zorah washes a shirt. Her chest hurts, and a dry cough has been troubling her for the past week. This morning she feels feverish and her body is aching. Her husband's illness started out the same way. Within a year he was dead. Zorah wrings out the last shirt as she gazes across the water. She didn't know about AIDS before, but she does now. She knows that it will kill her, too. She knows there is currently no cure. She knows that her family will be left alone. She doesn't know who will care for them.

The tears on her cheeks catch the light of the rising sun. She does not cry for long-- her family is waiting and they are hungry. She picks up the basket of wet clothes and begins the long, slow walk over the dirt road that leads back home."

-- A Voice for the Voiceless

I know this is not a great thing to read about. I know this is not comfortable, it does not make you and me feel good. But this is our reality. And it is a reality that God pleads for us to be aware of and to do something about.

Something that we've talked about in almost every week of lecture is the fact that over 300 verses in the Bible talk about the poor. (Compared to about 4 that refer to the antichrist-- why are so many people obsessed with end times? Just saying.) It seems that in all of our reading, we should get God's perspective and heart for those who are oppressed and rejected from society. Why don't we see this more often? Why haven't I seen this more often? I think it has a lot to do with our culture, and the fact that we've honestly and genuinely gotten lost in our self-improvements and encouraging sermons. Those are not bad, but why have we almost completely forgotten to mention those in need all over the world and that it is our biblical mandate, not suggestion, to do something to help them.

This is long already, and I don't mean to exhaust this subject, but it's been ignored for too long. One scripture study we've done is on James 1:27, "Religion that is pure and undefiled before God the Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their affliction, and to keep oneself unstained from the world." An interesting fact is that in the Greek text, "and" is not present between those two thoughts of caring for orphans and widows & keeping yourself unstained from the world. So if we read it as it should be understood, it would mean this: True worship that the Father accepts is to help the vulnerable TO be unstained. Truthfully, for our worship to be pleasing to God and for our lives to be lived purely and holy, we must serve the poor. All of us.

I would like to tell you that this is easy, but it's not. I wish I could give you a step-by-step list, but I think we all should just ask the Lord what He would have us do. I want to be physically present in their lives-- the literal hands and feet. Maybe you are to be an intercessor, or a financial supporter, or a home that welcomes families in need. There a bagillion things we can do to practically help. Find yours!

Isaiah 58:10

"And if you spend yourselves in behalf of the hungry and satisfy the needs of the oppressed, then your light will rise in the darkness, and your night will become like the noonday."

Notes: week 6

I'm just now taking the time to compile my thoughts from two weeks ago, our week on Urban Injustice taught by Troy Sherman. It's taken me this long because basically it was the most intense week for me so far. Troy's perspective is really challenging and seriously made me think about how I view life, why I'm here doing this school, and many other things. I'll try to put together bits and pieces that make sense.

Here we go...

• Why does God seem so distant and silent in the midst of our pain and suffering? Maybe He doesn't know what to do either. He might just sit back and cry harder than we are. Death, suffering, and disease were not part of His creation.
• Let's let God off the hook: there can be no accusation against Him for what's happening in the world. He Himself came down and paid for what He was never guilty for. There is nothing He hasn't covered.
• Are you blaming God for anything? Search your heart.
• Boredom is a luxury!
• Precepts in both Old and New Testaments can be used to transform nations. Example: burying your waste outside the camp-- this can be taught to communities worldwide who are dying from curable diseases because they use the bathroom anywhere they want.
• To stop this is difficult. To make an impact is not.
• Would you like to have an effective prayer life? Be willing to be the answer to your prayers. Or shut up!
• How could Jesus spend 30 years not doing public ministry and be content? What did He say on the cross? "I've done all You've asked me to do." It's not about doing everything; it's about doing what He has asked you to do today & being satisfied with that.
• Pay attention to what is most important on God's heart. It is probably what He mentions the most throughout scripture... the poor!
• Why do you think you need a call from God to help those who suffer? The fact that we have the word "injustice" is enough.
• 1 Cor. 4:16, You can only lead people as far as you've come yourself.
• If God gets involved in any issue in the world, He would have to get involved in EVERYTHING. Then the world would be over.
• There are problems and there are dilemmas. Dilemmas do not have a definite answer. Often we have to choose between bad and worse. (Example: abortion; our belief is to fight against abortion and pass laws to make it illegal. But if you look at crime statistics, about 80% of men in jail who commit crimes are from fatherless homes. Based on statistics, less abortions would equal more crime. What should we do?)
• Passion about everything results in passion for nothing.
• Doesn't it seem like the Church is focusing on the wrong thing? Gay marriage, for example. Why are we so passionately fighting against it when our marriages are not even successful? Ouch...
• Issue of overpopulation: it's been said that the entire world's population can fit in the state of Texas. Is overpopulation the problem? Or is it poor planning and development? Find better solutions, don't just complain.
• Educate yourself. Watch the news. Become a thinking Christian.
• Poverty is a circle. Men is squatter camps: not being able to work decreases their masculinity, so rapes increase in the community because the men have no feeling of worth or power in other ways. How can this be fixed? It can be as simple as making soccer fields and teaching them how to play. Just from the introduction of soccer, rapes decreased and the community was improved. Sometimes it's not as complicated as we think!
• Corruption: we can point the finger and say, "You are the problem," but we need to look at ourselves and ask, "Are we the reason that they are the problem?"
• "I don't want your money, I want your voice." -Bono; become an advocate. Use what's in your hand.
• "Yes we can!"

Yeah. That's a lot. I hope it makes sense! I still need to take time and meditate on some of these points. There is definitely a separation between truth and opinion, and it seems like most of that is just an opinion, but I encourage you that if you're offended by something to take it to God. It is possible that we are completely wrong in our thinking. "The world has told us what to think, but has no taught us how to think." In the realm of justice, I'm finding that statement to be more & more true.

Have a great week! This past week was on Human Trafficking and the coming one is Refugees & Immigration. I'll write about that soon enough!

Love to you.

Master vs. Me

Where is the separation

between where I end and where You begin?

Is there any separation at all?

Is it possible...

that parts of me could bring You glory, could please Your heart?

Is it possible that You've always had me in mind

that You delighted in me

before I even chose to love You?

Did you form the part of me

that laughs at funny voices and corny jokes?

What about the part that weeps at harsh words

and is broken for the broken-hearted?

Yeah, that had to be You.

How about the button nose, the curly hair,

the brown eyes?

Was all of this in your mind, God?

Where did the love for Fall-colored leaves

and bright Spring flowers come from?

And the joy of playing with children

and having long conversations with friends...

are all of these from Your heart?

Was it You that put all of this together

and called my name?

Was it You, Jesus?

Because if it was...

this changes everything.

Because if it was...

this means that it's possible.

I can love You.

I can delight in You.

And You can truly delight in Me.

Oh, my God.

I am forever Yours.

Hide me in You

and shine through me.

Because where You begin

is where I begin, too.

I want to thank my dear friend Tasha, who so encouraged me with the simple fact that our God is pleased with how He created us. Even though we stray and entangle ourselves with things that don't matter, He sees our bareness, our potential-- our original design. This is the hope I have, and the reason I treasure people and long for them to know Him: what He can do with us is so much more than anything we could do for ourselves. What He says about us is more meaningful than what anyone else could say to us. And the person He is recreating us to be is more beautiful than who we are striving to be.

I am confident of this:

that I can do nothing outside of Him. But through Him, and in Him, anything is possible.

Despite my inadequacy, my insecurity, my fear... He is God. May I surrender to that truth every single day, humbly following Him, trusting in Him at all times.

I'm learning not to lean on my own strength

I'm learning not to hold it all inside

I'm learning to depend on others

and most of all to depend on Christ.

I'm seeing that we truly are a body

that my part is so small

that I am not the carrier of the world's burdens

but I am a part of their healing process.

I'm learning that questions are good

and faith is everything.

I'm learning that it's not about how much I can do--

it's about being obedient to what He tells me to do today.

I'm learning that life is a struggle, and following Christ is living in tension.

I'm also learning that this is the worthiest of all pursuits;

that in the rough and tough, the broken and tattered, the hurt and pain,

my God seems most distant, yet His hope is most real.

And it is this hope that I must hold on to.

I'm learning that I can do it.

I can take it.

I can give it.

Less of my anger, more of His love

less of my control, more of His direction

less of my sympathy, more of His active compassion

less of my fear, more of His confidence

less of my pride, more of His humility

Less of me. More of Jesus.

Testimony time!

I am amazed. In more ways than one, but the main one being that last week God used His body to bless me in a tremendous way. On Thursday afternoon, the day before our first outreach payment of $1,500 was due, I received a check... for $1,500! If you've ever been in that position and God has shown up in that way, you know how I feel! If you haven't, well, let me tell you: IT'S AWESOME. I cannot explain how much it meant to me. Being in this season of coming back to YWAM and feeling like I'll soon be propelled into a huge thing that God has for me, it's like continuous demonstrations of His love and encouragement.

And Friday night as well as yesterday was so refreshing. Instead of going on our normal "Kingdom Night" outreach downtown, we had a time of worship and prayer. Something so powerful to me was a part of the night when we "stepped into" what we feel like God is calling us to. All of us went up and took a step forward and proclaimed that we would go and do whatever He has planned and gifted us to do. It was so good for me! And Saturday we went to a healing seminar at a church in Castle Rock. It was really neat and very challenging. I always find myself wondering if healing is what God wants all the time. I know He is completely good and sickness is not from Him, but things still happen, you know? So yesterday really challenged me to go back to the Bible and see His heart and purpose for healing in our lives, both physically and spiritually.

Just wanted to do a quick update about all of that. It's been a great weekend! :) Hope it's been great for you, too!

What a difference it would make...

I'm attempting the blog again. Bear with me.

Yesterday, we had Jeff Pratt (hugely anointed guy who usually teaches about the Father heart of God) speak to us for our afternoonsession. He leads a base in Connecticut, and is very passionate about social justice paired with a contemplative life. What he shared with us was so amazing. He began with the two human perspectives that we have when it comes to justice-- one being that social justice is all about people, two being that Jesus' life was primarily about social acts of justice.

Reading those statements, you (like me) might not see anything wrong with that. But Jeff helped us to see that justice is first and foremost about ministering to the heart of Christ; that when we give of ourselves to serve those in need, we areultimately doing it unto Him and not just to do a good thing. He challenged us in how we view the worth of Jesus using the example of Mary and her jar of perfume. The disciples thought the money for the perfume could be used in a more worthy way, like feeding the poor for example. Yet Mary saw the importance and complete worthiness in the person of Jesus, and did a beautiful act for Him. Hers was the most just act.

Next point: Jesus was a seer. Every action of Christ is prefaced with "Jesus saw." He cultivated the inner life and a heart after His Father, therefore He only did what He saw His Father doing. Who we are inside determines what we see on the outside, which determines what we do. We must be fixing our eyes on Jesus, asking Him for new eyes and new vision, and doing what we see Him doing. He did not touch, heal, or help every single person. He was fixated on His Father, obedient to Him alone. Jeff shared how we can get so easily overwhelmed when we see the huge needs of the world, and we see ALL the peoplesuffering, and try to help everyone through social action. This alone leads to burn out and depression, among many other issues. But focused on Jesus and living lives that constantly take time to rest in Him, focuson Him, contemplate everything beautiful that He is, we will live much richer and missional lives, and truly make a difference for the kingdom.

I've also been reading through A.W. Tozer's, The Pursuit of God. Wow. It's been so encouraging and refreshing and challenging. Some quotes from him:

"For now begins the glorious pursuit, the heart's happy exploration of the infinite riches of the Godhead. That is where we begin, I say, but where we stop no man has yet discovered, for there is in the awful and mysterious depths of the Triune God neither limit nor end."

"To have found God and still pursue Him is the soul's paradox of love, scorned indeed by the too easily satisfied religious, but justified in the happy experience by the children of the burning heart."

"We can well afford to make God our All; to concentrate, to sacrifice the many for the One."

"There must be a work of God in destruction before we are free. The cross is rough and it is deadly but it is effective."

"Men do not know that God is here. What a difference it would make if they knew."

That last quotes has stayed with me over the weeks. It's a wonderful reminder that men and women everywhere NEED to know that He is here and that He is love and that His power will transform anything and everything. Being downtown (I'm attaching pics of us painting!) has been a revelation of this gaping need in the lives of every person. I don't care what your argument is or who you are or where you're from, God is real and His reality changes lives. I know it. I've seen it. The guy in our picture had met some people from YWAM a few weeks ago, and he was in really bad shape. My friend Molly shared this later that night that they encouraged him and prayed for him, and he told her since then his life has been changing a lot, and in good ways! You never know how much a few words could mean. The Lord Jesus wants us to be a part of His work here and everywhere. I've been so blessed by the people I've met and shared stories with. It's like, just being available to Him can change eternity. He has a throbbing heart for His lost ones, and He'll give you that heart if you ask. But be ready to risk everything. I'm still in the process of letting go of fear and choosing to lay down my pride, taking up this amazing mission and message of reconciliation to all the earth, even to the city of Denver and wherever I might be next (hopefully Brazil!).

This week's teaching has been on reconciliation, by the way. We've learned about/ discussed conflict, along with recent and historical accounts of conflicts in the world, which led to justice and trying to figure out what justice actually is and how we can bring justice to situations. And today, we started talking about how reconciliation ties it all together, and is the desired end to any issue or happening in life. It's been very enlightening. I've loved getting to work in groups and hear everyone's experiences and perspectives. This school is so dynamic; I'm gaining so much!

AND, last thing, we just got back from the launch party for The Laboratory Combating Human Trafficking. It's so encouraging to know that there are so many other people working towards the same goal. Even though we don't have the same ways of reaching that goal, I believe God can work in any way through any person, and bringing freedom to the captives is definitely of and from Him.

Ok, that's life as of this week! Until next time...

(Here are the pics from Kingdom Night. The theme: Taste and see!)

Weeks 2 & 3:

Hello all! I apologize for the delayed update. Between 80-ish other people around the base, homework, class time, work duties, and a little bit of fun here and there, I have neglected my blog. So sorry!

Our first week of teaching (last week) was on Worldview. This week challenged me in so many ways. We took notes in a chart-form that showed how several different belief systems (Secular Humanism, Biblical Theology, New Age, Liberal Theology) line up under topics like psychology, biology, economics, etc., forming each worldview. Learning about the basics of these beliefs was very interesting and sometimes convicting when you realize you've been veering away from the biblical worldview in different areas of life and how you perceive what's right and wrong. It's pretty hard to write about... ask me when I get back!

Week 3: Spirituality of Justice. Our speaker fell through for this week, but it was just as great, I think! We had one day of teaching; the basics being that we are to administer justice in both the spiritual and physical realms. A great analogy of this is like hugging the world with both the arm of evangelism (spiritual) AND the arm of social action (physical). That sounds cheesy, but it helped me understand. :)

My favorite part was going through the Old Testament and seeing God's heart for justice, and following it through to the teachings of Jesus and how He lived His life for others. Overall, we're called to be "Both/ And" Christians: people who serve not only the immediate physical needs, but also bring the love and mercy and grace of the Father to their souls as well.

The book we're reading is called Quest for Hope in the Slum Community. It's sooooooo intense. Pretty much like a missions encyclopedia. So when I can sit and process my thoughts about it, I'll tell you more. (I feel like this entry is a let-down!)

Another thing I want to tell you about is our Kingdom Night outreaches. Every Friday night a huge group of us goes to downtown Denver just to be available to talk to people, pray for people, give out free hot chocolate (or whatever else we can find!) and see what the Lord wants to do. It's been AMAZING. Quick stories: the other night, a few people from our group stayed behind to pray for this man. He was actually demon-possessed (I know thats freaky, but it happens) and they prayed for him and saw him set free. He also had problems with his knee, and while my friend Cat was laying hands on him, she felt it literally pop back into place!

I will share more later, I'm going to hang out with some friends who are in town. I'm sorry again that this is a lame blog, there's honestly too much to say.

I'm ready for this coming week, which is on Reconciliation. We're also going to a "premiere" of a local human trafficking organization this week. I will definitely include that in my next update. Thanks for keeping up with me! I will write again soon.

Love to you!

PS: My first outreach payment of $1,500 is due this Friday. I'll post my address if you are interested in helping me get to Brazil! I will also post more about our trip... later! :)

YWAM Denver

Candice Lyerla SSJ

12750 W. 63rd Ave

Arvada, CO 80004

Week 1: It Begins

If you have not been keeping up with me, let me fill you in: I'm in Denver, Colorado, doing YWAM's School of Social Justice.

We've finished the first week, which mainly consists of going over YWAM Denver's guidelines, trying to remember the names of everyone in my school (thankfully there are only 12 of us!), organizing a room with 8 girls and tons of stuff, school bonding time, getting acclimated to being a mile high with very dry weather (thus, drinking LOTS of water), and adjusting to the busy & full YWAM schedule. I went to bed before 8 last night, if that tells you anything. :)

My hope during this time is to be able to communicate to y'all what we are learning in school and also what God is specifically speaking to me. I've already heard so much! One of the many great things about being here is constantly being surrounded by a loving, supportive community. People who aren't afraid to ask you hard questions, and who are willing to pray for you and comfort you through it all. Oftentimes the clearest I hear God is through his obedient children. For example, yesterday morning during our worship time we were encouraged to receive and give prayer and allow the Lord to speak through us prophetically. (Don't let that word scare you: it simply means building someone up, encouraging, speaking out what you feel the Holy Spirit is speaking to you.) A couple people came to me and confirmed so much of what I've been feeling: "don't be afraid of what God wants to do in you & through you, or of where He is taking you. He is so glad you are here and that you have chosen to go through this process and step into your destiny. Even though your vision for the future is blocked, don't let that hold you back. Keep trusting Him."

Something that I will be specifically praying for through this time is about our outreach to Brasil. We had a teaching on fundraising this week and it was so encouraging. God provided the entire tuition for my lecture phase, but I will need about $3,000 more for outreach. I am very expectant-- especially hearing from other people here about how He miraculously made the way for them monetarily. I do not doubt His faithfulness, but I was questioning whether I should go or not. In which He answered with this verse: Psalm 82:3, "Give justice to the poor and the orphan; uphold the rights of the oppressed and the destitute." So awesome! And so specific for me, since we are planning to work in an orphanage the whole time we're there.

I've already received a sweet, generous gift from a friend, and that meant the world to me. If He calls, He will provide. And I trust Him with my whole heart.

I'll be sending an email in the next couple weeks with more information about our trip. Please email me if you're interested in what we're doing, and/or if you'd like to help me get there financially!

candice_mae@hotmail.com